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Showing posts from November, 2024

After That Election, Feeling Bad Might Just Be Good

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Well, I’ll be processing my feelings about the election for some time to come. I’ve noticed that they parallel the well-known seven stages of grief - shock and disbelief, denial, guilt and bargaining, sadness and regret, and anger. I haven’t made it through yet to the final stages of acceptance and hope, but I’m working on it. There’s so much disappointment in the fellow Americans who didn’t see the candidates the way I did. Maybe it was ignorance, but maybe what I saw that disgusted me about the eventual “winner” actually appealed to them. Maybe his appeal was that he hated the same people his voters hated. Maybe it was denial that no matter what he said, no one could really be that cruel and self-centered. Maybe it showed that old-fashioned racism, sexism, homophobia, and transphobia are more central to the worldviews of his voters than we imagined. There seems to be enough evidence for any or all of this combining to enable him to scare the living daylights out of people with his pa...

Ready or Not – Here Come Those Family Holidays

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I have a good friend who dreads the holiday season, saying: “The holidays are upon my a##.” But it’s here anyway with all those upcoming expectations of Norman-Rockwell-print warm, loving, accepting images of Thanksgivings, Hanukkahs, and Christmas celebrations where families gather together to try to recreate them. They’re usually laden with consumer goods that buy perfect gatherings along with national myths to “explain” why we’re supposed to be joyful about it all. Yet, the reality is that many are “celebrating” with depression and disappointment. Even suicide rates increase this time of year. I wonder how many people actually experience the joy they expect, rather than find these to be anniversaries of exhausting, dysfunctional family pasts. It’s no wonder that streaming movies such as National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation , Home for the Holiday, or even the Home Alone series now constitute holiday traditions. Maybe most of us long for pasts that today’s nostalgia has us believin...