Fairness - The Commentary

The Big Con on America worked. A perfect storm of  many  failings (pick your favorite whipping boy) allowed the candidate who won over two million more votes to lose to a bigoted, offensive, failed businessman. Because consistency isn’t characteristic of this president-elect, we can’t know what’s in store. Whatever it is, it’ll  fatten his pocketbook  and ego - his pathological narcissism means the next four years look insecure. Because right-wing Republicans control Congress, their radical agenda with that of their Koch-brother-class owners will likely move forward. Without robust Democratic opposition, given the history of mainstream elite Democratic attempts to make nice, we could witness a major reactionary rightward shift. If those who object shun the 2018 election, as is their habit, these four years look like hell for America’s most vulnerable. Oh, the privileged, especially well-off white males, will do just fine. So, it’s time to do everything it takes to correct a r

Some often well-meaning folks are calling for all sorts of attempts to forgive and make nice. Here are some of my controversial thoughts about forgiveness (I'm not a religious thinker but a historian of religion): (1) Forgiving people who have not asked for your forgiveness is an assertion of a superior moral position over them. It's passive-aggressive. (2) Forgiving people for what they have done that hurts and continues to hurt others is to assert I am god. (3) Forgiveness is not a requirement for personal closure no matter how people say it is. It takes real counseling or the equivalent. It takes feeling one's feelings fully through them (like the 7 stages of grief), though not thinking, acting or deciding on them. I am with those therapists who say that rushing to forgive without doing previous personal work is actually emotionally harmful and an act of denial. (4) Telling people they should forgive someone who hurt them is preaching at them and minimizing t